Healing Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)
After practicing medicine for decades, I was stunned when I first learned about Adverse Childhood Events, known as ACEs, and their lifelong negative impact on individuals, families, and society. An ACE is a childhood experience of violence, physical or emotional abuse, neglect, addiction in the home, or parental divorce— first described by Fellitti and Anda in the late 90s. A high ACE score, as determined by a standardized 10-question ACE survey completed by adults about their own childhood, predicts negative outcomes of all types: worse physical and mental health; greater incidence of obesity, addiction, and accidents; and, reduced longevity. High ACE scores have also been found to correlate with unhealthy decision making , risky behaviors, and a type of genetic change that can affect the next generation.
In What are Adverse Childhood Experiences?, I write about the moment I first realized that ACEs were at least a partial explanation for the many health problems of my immigrant and homeless patients in Washington, DC. They had so many strikes against them, often from day one.
In his landmark book, The Body Keeps the Score, psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk speaks with painful clarity when he says, “As the ACE study has shown, child abuse and neglect is the single most preventable cause of mental illness, the single most common cause of drug and alcohol abuse, and a significant contributor to leading causes of death such as diabetes, heart disease, cancer, stroke, and suicide.”
But there is good news. Everything we have learned about ACEs helps us understand the problem and enables us to start working to prevent and heal ACEs. In the face of a crisis of this magnitude, it might be easy to think we can’t do anything—for ourselves or others. But resources like Van der Kolk’s book, and other references listed below, tell a different story: there are many actions we can take.
In addition to these actions, I must add one other vital thing we can do. We can pray for the healing of ACEs. Each morning we can ask God to heal the effect of ACEs and help us prevent ACEs. Since God is timeless, we can ask him to heal past, present, and future generations.
What follows is a formal version of my own daily prayer. Let’s storm heaven with our prayers for healing, guidance, and the courage to take action.
PRAYER FOR HEALING OF ACEs
Our loving and merciful God, you know us inside and out—and you know our families.
Some of us had parents who hurt us. They were addicted, abusive, or broken. Please give us the grace we need to seek help, care for ourselves, and forgive. Heal us, O Lord.
When we look back on our child-raising years, some of us have come to realize that our own actions, inactions, and words wounded our children. Heal our adult children, help us to forgive ourselves and accept we did the best we could, and show us how to embrace and trust your healing love for ourselves, our families, and all families. Heal us, O Lord.
Some of us are desperate every single day as we struggle to raise our kids. We love our children, but we are overwhelmed with bills, possible eviction, sickness, addiction, or abuse. We feel gut-wrenching hopelessness. Heal us, O Lord. Send a miracle. Send someone. We beg you.
Some of us had parents who loved us and tried very hard but weren’t perfect and unknowingly hurt us. Even though our ACE score may be low, we too need help. Please open the eyes of our hearts so we can recognize the times we think and act unconsciously in ways that harm—mindlessly reacting to our childhood experiences.
Heal all of us, O Lord. Give us the gift of your presence so we can be instruments of your healing for others. Give us patience, tolerance, and understanding so we can prevent ACEs by helping others find hope and healing. Help us reach out to a vulnerable child at risk of being harmed because of poverty, neglect, or addiction in the family—may we be that caring adult that will change a child’s life.
We pray to you, our loving God, that all the effects of ACEs— past, present, and future—be healed, and that ACEs be no more. Heal us, O Lord. Amen.
SUGGESTIONS:
Learn more about ACEs. Useful resources include: The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.; Childhood Disrupted by Donna Jackson Nakazawa; The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity by Nadine Burke Harris; the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention; and the ACE questionnaire with instructions how to interpret it.
My 2020 Blog, “ACE Place,” will guide you in how best to take action depending on your own circumstances.
Save the Prayer for Healing ACEs and say it daily. Below is a downloadable version [pdf] to make this easier. Please download the file and share it widely via email or social media.
God bless each and every one of you,
Donna
P.S. In my recently released book, Pilgrimage: A Doctor’s Healing Journey, I include ACE-related topics. For information, go to serenityandhealth.com/pilgrimage.
P.P.S. I also want to tell you about my recent guest appearance on the Fierce Calling Podcast with Doris Swift where Doris and I discuss my journey back to serenity, health, and God. Listen to it here.
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Dr. Donna Chacko promotes health of body, mind, and spirit through her website (serenityandhealth.com), her blog, and programs at her church. She is the author of the award-winning book and Amazon best-seller Pilgrimage: A Doctor’s Healing Journey (Luminare Press, 2021). You can read her full bio here.
Additional Reading
After I retired in 2013, I was stunned when I first learned about Adverse Childhood Events, known as ACEs, and their lifelong negative impact on individuals, families, and society…